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" Male vs Female " at the ATM..............

Discussion in 'Know Before You Go' started by JOHN(NJ), Jul 14, 2005.

  1. JOHN(NJ)

    JOHN(NJ) Guest

    A sign in the bank lobby reads: "Please note that this bank is installing
    new Drive-through teller machines enabling customers to withdraw cash
    without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are
    requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their
    accounts. After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE procedures have
    been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."

    MALE PROCEDURE:
    1. Drive up to the cash machine.
    2. Put down your car window.
    3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
    4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
    5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
    6. Put window up.
    7. Drive off.

    FEMALE PROCEDURE:

    1. Drive up to cash machine.
    2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the
    machine.
    3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
    4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
    5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up
    6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
    7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive
    distance from the car.
    8. Insert card.
    9. Re-insert card the right way.
    10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside
    back page.
    11. Enter PIN.
    12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
    13. Enter amount of cash required.
    14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
    15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
    16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
    17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of
    checkbook.
    18. Re-check makeup.
    19. Drive forward 2 feet.
    20. Reverse back to cash machine.
    21. Retrieve card.
    22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot
    provided.
    23. Give appropriate look at the irate male driver waiting behind you.
    24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
    25. Redial person on cell phone.
    26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
    27. Release parking brake

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
     
  2. maw

    maw Guest

    Now I know why I have never used an ATM machine. I don't drive. Thanks JOhn lol.
     
  3. seagarsmoker

    seagarsmoker Guest

  4. JohnG

    JohnG Guest

    My wife' s comment, and she is a banker:

    "Cute!! One footnote: men leave their cards in the machine and drive off more frequently than women who obviously sit in the lane a lot longer!!"
     
  5. nieciez

    nieciez Guest

    :nono :spank :nono John
     
  6. Tread

    Tread Guest

    Feeling frisky this morning John? :lol :lol
     
  7. red stripe

    red stripe Guest

    Ah John.... glad to see you........ I think.... :grin

    Actually there is a lot of truth in that.. I usually go to bank.. pull into a parking space.... get my ducks all in a row, and then drive up to the ATM, where I can do things the guy way.. ....................................................

    other than the fact that unlike any of the guys I have been behind.. I drive forward to count my money.. giving the person behind me a chance to start to conduct their business :lol
     
  8. Erinm

    Erinm Guest

    My husband will rarely use the drive through as he's convinced he's going to hit the mirror on the machine. I, on the other hand, can deposit a cheque in about 20 seconds and be off WITH BANK CARD IN HAND! I think when it comes to the actual banking portion, women are MUCH faster. Some men seem to stare at the machine as though the options change every time. JMHO though :) :) :)
     
  9. Cruise cutie

    Cruise cutie Guest

    I'm with Red... BUT I used to be a bank teller in another life.in both drive-thru and at a main teller line....those 2 years are invaluable and I still retain all my habits from then..sigh..you outta see men at banks..:dizzy.they really have no clue..they need a pen, they need a deposit ticket..oops forgot to sign the back as you're getting cash...OMG..=hammer..Give me a woman most times..sigh.. JMHO..:grin..have a good day John..BRAT!!..:daisy..Joanne
     
  10. Hooked

    Hooked Guest

    Sounda about right!!!!

    Hi JohnG
     
  11. red stripe

    red stripe Guest

    Hooked.. you would have a problem shoving your cash in your wallet with those long fingernails :lol
     
  12. Mal D. Olive

    Mal D. Olive Guest

    :thumb John!

    Though I must admit I take one more step. I count the monies I withdraw in front of the ATM so the security camera can catch it, just in case the amount dispensed is incorrect! And yes it does sometimes happen!
     
  13. JOHN(NJ)

    JOHN(NJ) Guest

    Gee I never thought this would stir any controversy............................
     
  14. red stripe

    red stripe Guest

    right John :grin
     

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