I'm so so sorry Duskbat. It does get easier as the years go on....but the emptiness always remains. My beloved Gizmo went to sleep in my arms two years ago December 19th, and not a day goes by that I don't think about him and miss him.....but the pain has dulled now and I have only the good memories. I know it doesn't help, but I do know how you are feeling. Wish I could say or do something that would help you.