Now I'm losing it, big time!!!!!



OK, the past couple days my hair has been shedding a bit faster than normal, but last night YIKES ~ all of a sudden it came out by the handfuls. I know I got it cut very short in anticipation for this event, but guess I really wasn’t ready for the reality of it to hit me so forcefully. Deana, I just might be bald by the time you get here next weekend, we’ll see. I’m experimenting this time to see if I really need to shave it all off or if I can live with this intense shedding all over the place. LOL The doctor says it will probably just thin out a lot this time but I’m thinking it will do more than that at the rate it’s going now. My hip is still very sore and weak, and sleep is now a very precious commodity. I really miss calling my Mom and chatting about everything. Thank God for Mary and Sam who make me feel like a cherished daughter. Our tree was delivered yesterday but it’s still bundled up tight and it is really hard for me to not be able to haul out the decorations and get it set up all by myself. I can no longer carry large bulky items because I’m so unsteady on my feet so I finally asked my room mate to carry the boxes in from the garage, but climbing up on any step stool or ladder to put up the house decorations is definitely out of the question this year. This is all very frustrating for me, and I don’t think I will ever get used to the idea of not being totally independent. Waiting for help is just not in my nature, I’d just rather do it myself and get it done!!!

So I’ve got to balance all of these realities with something positive or I’ll just crawl back under the covers and cry myself to sleep. I can still make all of my holiday goodies, got the chocolate chips and nuts, just need the rest of the ingredients. As long as I can still stir that fudge I’ll be happy. I’m already planning some fun things to do when my sister arrives for a week, lots of magical light displays around our city. I found a few new snowflakes to add to my own winter wonderland theme. I’ve been hunting around in cyberspace for free printable miniature projects so I can make a few more cute little items to tuck into the girl’s doll houses. The mini Christmas trees are all decorated and look so darn cute, and the village looks awesome, especially when it’s lit at night. Hopefully I can find all of my Christmas music this afternoon. Night driving is now tough, but heading out during the day is a snap. It’s weird how the oncoming driving lights cause such havoc with my vision. I gave all of the Fischer Price toys that I had been saving for so many years now to Bill’s grand daughter and she calls them “Ronda’s toys†and puts them all away back in their big box whenever she is finished playing with them. What a delightful child this is, so precocious and very bright. Reminds me of my daughters when they were that age. I’ve located almost all the parts to my nieces doll house kit so now I’m chomping at the bit to get started on that project soon as Christmas is over. Building doll houses always makes me smile. It’s such a great creative outlet for me. The simple act of planning out all the details suddenly gave me a whole new burst of energy and joy that I haven’t been able to enjoy since that fateful day in Oct when my doctor handed me me such a devastating blow and I found out the cancer had returned with such a vengeance. I made the decision this year to enjoy ALL of my family holiday traditions, haul out every one of my decorations, make all of my favorite goodies, and just plain be grateful that I can enjoy even one more blessed Christmas season. I’m just taking it all a bit slower this year and savoring each and every moment. OK, time to go peek in all those Christmas boxes.

Monday update ~ Well, I almost crashed into the darn Christstmas tree when I went to hang the lights. I can just see the headlines now ~ "Christmas fanatic takes a nose dive as she reaches for the 'perfect spot' for those lights. Ms Mariposa did a kamakazi dive into her tree. Do you think she will ever learn?" LOL Well, I didn't actually fall, but sure did come close, and I wasn't even standing on a ladder. OOPS I'm thinking that next year I'll let someone else put those confounded lights on the tree and I'll just sit there sipping hot cocoa and cheer them on. GEEZ, I sure do miss doing all the things that I normally tackle each year. I do not want to wait till hubby gets home to do it all cuz we all know that MOM decorates the tree best..... Now, if I can just get the rest of that tree decorated without any incidents. LOL

Happy Holidays everyone ~ stay safe
Hugs, Mariposa


You are a gift to all. Your insights and perspective never fail to bring a smile to my face. Peace, joy and blessings to you at this holdiday season and always. Prayers......


I don't know which would be worse - having your hair fall out like that or being handed a bag of your hair that they shaved off in order to operate on your brain. Either can be devastating but one thing about hair, it usually grows back!

And I hear and understand your frustration about not being able to do the things that you have always done in the past. Just glad that you are still with us!

Hope you have as Merry a season as you can.



As long as it's your hair and not your mind you've got hope! :grin You're gonna have to get out those jazzy hats again! =hug=hug=hug


Do we dare ask if the tree is finished? PLEASE be careful and don't push your luck - you really don't need to break something. Keep on keeping on, girl!


I'm sorry to hear about your hair but glad to hear your sense of humor coming through your post. Continuing to send good thoughts your way.

Cruise cutie

=hugs love, and prayers still continue, and not stop. May peace be with you every day too...:daisy.Joanne


Mariposa, you lady are incredible. Please be careful and take it one day at a time! Hugs.


Prayers & hugs go out to you at this time.
May you have a joyful & peaceful Holiday season.


Be careful, Ronda....please take it slow and easy. You surely are a wonder, and I hope things improve for you for the Holidays.

No fun with the hair loss, I do know. But thank goodness for all the nice hats out there.

Wishing for better days for you ((((Ronda)))))


Mari I w3as thinking the other day abt your jazzy haircut and purple hair last time. I have spells whre I loose wads of hair from low oxygen so I understnd finding it everywhere all the time.. Your spirit is such a pleasure to see. I know how it is to want t be able t do what we re used to. You will just have to learn to say when you try and can't oh so wasn't important anyway like I do. Just don't feel gulity when you can't Hugs Maw


Ah sweetie,you should of seen all the icicles and ornaments I made fall off the tree last night,I finally gave up and let John finish the tree,its lovely and if yours isnt done wait for your sister to come,something shared like that is so much love,I cryed but I laughed and thank God I can still sing,I just sang carols while he made Christmas for me,I cant even do the cookies I am so tired of not feeling my legs and hurting but I am trying to be patient and go with the flow,you my dear are a lady who inspires us all and I love you very much,take care,and many hugs!


I could have sworn I replied much earlier, but please know you continue in my prayers, Ronda. You are one, incredible lady.



Mariposa, I don't know what to say. You are going thru so much and you are so strong. God love you dear, hang in there! (((HUGS)))


I know of 2 women, one who I work with that is losing so much hair and they don't know why. One resorted to wearing a wig. The other is taking Biotin, and using Rogaine. What the heck is going on?